I RUINED HER (She’s a Serial Killer 2)
I was drunk when I got home. Galing ako sa puntod ng anak ko at ng babaeng mahal ko. It’s almost nine months when she passed away and left me.
“Jake, sa’n ka galing? Ginabi ka na naman ng uwi,” bungad sa ’kin ni Rain
She’s Rain, waitress sa isang bar. I accidentally impregnate her that’s why she is here.
“The h-ll you care?”
“I care, ikaw ang ama ng dinadala ko,” saad nito, tyaka hinawakan ang braso ko.
“So, what? Sa anak ko lang ako may responsibilidad at hindi sa ’yo. You are not my wife, ina kalang ng anak ko,” I scolded at her as I left.
I immediately went to my room as I saw my pictures together with my diseased girlfriend. I really missed her so much, f-ck.
—
I woke up early, anniversarry namin ngayon ng babaeng mahal ko. It should be our 3rd anniversarry.
“Jake, saan ka pupunta? Pwede mo ba akong samahan magpacheck-up ngayon? Ang hirap kasing sumakay o pumara ng taxi eh,” Rain asked me.
“May importante akong pupuntahan, kaya mo ’yan. May mga kamay at paa ka naman,” saad ko bago ito tuluyang iniwan.
I bought flowers and cake at pumunta sa puntod ni Scent at ng anak namin. I even brought our photos together. I spent my whole day besides her, their grave.
“Love, kung alam ko lang na buntis ka.
H-Hindi ko sana hinayaang mangyari ’yon,” saad ko sa kawalan.
Suddenly my phone buzzed, someone texted me but I just ignored it. Hating gabi na nang maisipan kong umuwi.
I was surprised, when I got home. Walang Rain na bumungad sa ’kin. Agad akong nagtungo sa aking silid upang magpahinga.
—
Napabalikwas ako ng bangon nang makarinig nang sunod-sunod na katok mula sa aking pinto. Inis akong tumayo at binuksan ito.
“What the h-ck is your prob—” Hindi ko natapos ang dapat kong sabihin, when someone slapped me.
It was Rain, she’s crying.
“Hay-p ka, ang sama-sama mo. Alam ko namang wala kang pake sa ’kin eh, p-pero sana kahit sa anak ko, anak mo man lang meron!” she shouted habang sunod-sunod ang pagpatak ng kan’yang mga luha.
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I can’t understand h-her.
“I asked you na samahan ako but you refused. Tapos tinext kita para puntahan kami sa hospital d-dahil nabangga ako.” gulat ko itong tinignan.
“Pero hindi ka p-parin pumunta.” napaupo siya sa sahig habang nakatakip ang dalawang kamay nito sa kaniyang mukha.
“W-What? hindi ko alam,” saad ko tyaka pinantayan ito ng upo.
“Kasi wala ka namang alam, wala ka namang pake sa akin eh, sa amin.” she said sarcastically dahilan para mapatahimik ako.
“I’m sorry, let’s fix this. Pwede pa tayong magsimula m-muli,” I uttered as I held her hand, pero agad niya rin itong binawi.
“Para saan pa? Wala na ’yong dahilan kung bakit mo ako pinatuloy dito, wala ng dahilan para m-magsama pa tayo,” umiiyak na saad nito, tyaka tumayo.
“Wala na ang a-anak natin.” huling saad nito, before she walked outside my room.
F-ucked, this is all my fault.
Tumayo ako para sundan ito. I saw her wiping her tears habang hawak ang isang maleta.
“Please, don’t leave? I’m so s-sorry.”
“Hindi ko sinasadya, I care for you and the baby it was jus—” hindi ko natapos ang sasabihin ko nang putulin niya ito.
“It was just you’re too busy na ipagluksa ang babaeng mahal mo at ang anak niyo?”
“I understand, I really u-understand,” she added while sobbing.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“You’ve broke your own self because of her. That’s why I am trying to f-fix you. But, while fixing you, you’ve ruined m-me.”
“It’s hard to fix a broken piece when you are also broken, Jake.”
“I’m sorry, I broke you. I ruined y-your life.”
“I hate myself so much, kung sana hindi ako pumasok sa ganitong klaseng sitwasyon. Kung hindi ko sana sinabi na panagutan mo ako, b-buhay pa sana ang anak ko.” huminga ito nang malalim as she started to walk away.
“I hate myself for loving you and letting you to r-ruined me.” huminto ito bago muling nagsalita.
“Ang sakit mong mahalin, sobra. Ang sakit magmahal ng taong hindi pa t-tapos magmahal ng iba.” she added then left me.
I broke two women at the same reason but different situations. Because of me, my first two babies died.
End.
words by; Rarity Asiana.
